Packing up and moving to another country is a great adventure for everyone, but if you are moving abroad with children, you will need to plan your move with extra care to ensure your happiness and theirs.

To guide you through the planning process and pitfalls, we spoke with Kate Berger, an Amsterdam-based psychologist who specializes in child development and consults on expat kids and cultural adjustment.

We asked Berger how parents should prepare their children to move abroad and what kind of behavioral changes to expect during and after the move.

Berger said a lot of people do not give moving abroad with children the attention it requires. She suggested that during the early stages of planning families do a “go-see” to experience their new environment with the kids and learn as much about the location as possible before making the commitment to move.

“Exposing kids to the new foods they will be eating, for example, can be a great way to get them prepared for their new environment,” Berger said. “Also, you should help them connect with other kids who are in a similar situation. Exposing them early on to the expat lifestyle helps them understand that they are not the only ones going through this. Talk to your kids about it and ask them questions so you can get their perspective. Then they will have a much better understanding of what is going to happen and be more prepared to accept the move.”

Berger also said that involving children in decision-making ahead of time could be empowering because most of the time kids are not moving by choice. Often they feel left out or might even be angry because they have not been included in these kinds of conversations.

“Involve them in decision-making ahead of time so they can be part of choosing what color their room is going to be or where they want to go for a day-trip once they arrive or what they want to pack in their backpack,” she said. “Even things like how they want to say goodbye to their friends can make a big difference in their acceptance of the move and an easier transition for them.”

Moving to a different country often brings behavioral changes, Berger said, which affects younger children the most. She said these changes are an indication that that they may be struggling with something internally. They might not come forward but instead hold it in.

“You need to tune in and observe the behavioral changes, things like if their sleeping patterns change drastically or if they are eating differently,” she said. “Maybe you notice them being more moody or not engaging in certain activities that they usually enjoy, maybe arguing more with siblings or with parents.”

Berger also pointed out that age is a very important consideration. She said younger children might be able to express what they are going through, but for older kids and teenagers, independence is more important.